Saturday, August 14, 2004

I Am A Disaster

I'm having such a bad day. Right now I am really wishing that I had some of those wonderful "happy" pills that people on TV always seem to have available. As it is, I had to settle for a Bloody Caesar and hope for the best. I'm hoping that it will calm me down a little bit.

Do you ever have those days where everything you do or touch turns out badly? I'm having one of those days and have felt so close to tears all day that those "little" things often turn into big things.

We (my husband and I) are painting the bedroom this weekend. Well, I feel like I have run into problems everywhere I turn. I am just not meant to paint today. If I try to help anymore than I already did I fear that I will blow my stack. I should amend that. I have already blown my stack once today so I would, effectively, blow my stack for the second time.

Poor Eric is up there painting alone. He tried to coax me off the couch but I know that I would just have a freakin' breakdown if I dribbled paint or made a mistake. I told him that he would get it done quicker without me and he seemed to accept that, not really knowing what else to do I am sure.

I wish that I had as much patience as him. Not only that, but annoying or frustrating things just seem to roll off him. Would that it were that way for me. One bad thing can affect my whole day. He just grins and moves on. I really admire that. How can one attain that mindset? Is it something you're born with?

I guess it's a good thing that the powers that be saw fit to pair me with him. If I had married someone more like me it would be crazy. As it is, he seems to be able to gauge my moods and usually knows the right thing to do or say to "appease" me.

Well I have to admit that I do feel a little bit better now. Writing seems to be cathartic or calming. Talking (writing) it out seems to make everything a little more clearer or something.

Maybe I'll grab another Caesar and go see how the Painter is doing.

The Buzz:

At 8:07 p.m., Blogger Alianora declared...

Well I hope the rest of your day goes better! You and Eric sound alot like my parents. My father can let everything roll off his back like no big deal, everything is mind over matter and for him it's as simple as deciding to tackle something and get it done. I think without him around my mother would be literally nuts. I am not saying you are exactly like her, but she's a worrier. She has little patience for things that aren't going just as she had planned them, whether it be something around the house or some kind of communication in their marriage.

To calm down, maybe you can sit down and write a list of the wonderful things that you bring to the marriage that help balance things out from your side...

At 10:20 p.m., Blogger Alianora declared...

I just want to say that I didn't mean to offend with that last comment, so please don't take it in offense. I hope the rest of your weekend goes much better and that you are satisfied with the painting once it is all finished! I'm sure it will be a great relief to see the room come together so well as planned!


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